FB Updates 2

my sweet boy looked lovingly at me as I cuddled him to sleep and said, "oh! I know another lady who has a mustache like yours!" Awesome.

This morning I imagined my 16 year-old self time-traveling to the present and hearing the radio broadcast: Celebrity/Politician cheated on spouse (no shocker there), Rapture upon us (ok, kind of freaky) commercial for medical marijuana (wait, what?!)

waking up at 4:30 a.m. is like eating an entire box of chocolates everyday in the winter and 2:30 p.m. is bathing suit season. The first one seems like a pretty good idea until the second one comes along.

Sleep is such a tease. We have been flirting for the last 3 nights, I'm really hoping tonight's the night we go all the way in the sack.

my 10 year old son while watching Tom & Jerry: "ha, a mouse in a hardware store...he's 'screwed'." :)

Test results: I only feel well if I eat strictly fruits and veggies. Self diagnosis: I’m a frickin toucan. Great.

My favorite (paraphrased) quote from TED:  try not to say anything you wouldn’t allow to stand as your last words to someone ~Auschwitz survivor.

Why is nobody addressing the homeless Smurf problem?! Oh, your mouth is too full of morel mushrooms? I hope Smurfette tastes as good as you always imagined. Homewreckers :)

I hope they give “Hazard Pay” to the guy whose job it is to change the gas price signs at the gas station. That’s a VERY vulnerable position to be in…your back against the traffic as you change the price from $3.73 to $3.99. Not safe. Not safe at all.

hey, guess what. If you run over a dead porcupine that's been marinating in the rain for an entire afternoon, the stench that wafts into your car through your heat vents is heavy on the "pork you" and light on the "pine". (and by "pork you", I basically mean "old raw burger")